Today, I am working at my church (Faith Outreach Center Intl.), and I'm trying to figure this whole children's ministry thing out. I've got a few children's ministry positions to fill by next month. I won't be able to fill them because my family and I will be out of town...mainly doing music stuff. I called my new music project "Between Dreams and Reality" because that is exactly how I feel. The cover picture of me wearing headphones while dressed in church leadership clothing (and sweating) is a pretty accurate depiction of my life right now. I love what I do at the church, but I feel like there's more. I love music too! Honestly, ministering to people (young and old) through music is my passion. I feel like I'm almost in the right place, but I haven't quite hit that pinpoint position where passion intersects with work. So I feel like I'm experiencing two different worlds on a regular basis.
When I feel stuck between this dream that God has given me and the reality of my current situation, I experience these incredible mountaintop moments which are generally followed by valley moments. I feel like my mountaintop experiences are when I'm creating and performing music. Building relationships with other people and investing into their lives so that they can be who God has created them to be? Mountaintop experience!! I feel like my valley moments are when I'm doing office work. It's when I'm turning in check requests, returning emails, researching camp, scheduling youth events, managing check-in systems, charting and tracking ministry growth, teleconferences...come to think of it...anything administration? Valley experience lol! It's not that for everyone, but it definitely feels like that for me! So what am I supposed to do? Because I don't get paid enough to work on the mountaintop yet. I get paid to work in the valley! (Can I be real?)
The Holy Spirit has really encouraged me with Ecclesiastes 3:1 lately.
It says, "To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven."
That verse is followed by examples of what we would consider "high times" and "low times". Here are some points that I got from this text:
- We live life in seasons. Life wasn't meant to be lived in one long season of high moments or one long season of low moments. So if I expect not to go through seasons, then I'm setting myself up for disappointment.
- There is a time attached to every purpose under heaven. While I'm in the valley, I shouldn't waste my time wishing that I was on the next mountaintop. There is a time sensitive purpose in the valley.
- The mountains and the valleys work together in God's grand design for my life. The purpose can be easy to see when I'm on the mountaintop. But I need to remind myself of the purpose while I'm in the valley.
While praying the other day, I found myself getting upset because I wanted to just go and do music! The church missions team is out impacting the world. A few of my friends just launched a tour, another signed a distribution deal, some of them were scheduled to head over to Azusa NOW to pray and worship with some of my favorite ministers and bands. I was like, "Lord, why do you have me in this position?" I was in my feelings lol! Then the Holy Spirit gently spoke to me and said, "I am giving you time to prepare for your upcoming season." Now, my mind wanted to rejoice and be like, "Oh yeah, my time is coming!" But there was a deeper message that the Lord wanted me to get. He wanted me to understand that the time in the valley was just as holy as the time on the mountaintop. The mountains and the valleys work hand in hand in God's landscape for my life. Valleys give me rest. Valleys help me refocus. Valleys forge my character. Valleys keep me humble. What happens in the valley doesn't stay in the valley. It helps to sustain me at the mountaintop.
To purchase my new CD "Between Dreams and Reality", click HERE
I hope this read and the CD encourages you!